3 Ways To Avoid Breaking Your Wife’s Nose & Throwing Shoes At Your Kids: Jonathon Dwyer
Arizona Cardinals running back Jonathan Dwyer was charged with assaulting his wife during arguments over suspicions of him cheating [via phone records] in July. The suspended Dwyer was hit last week with felony aggravated assault and eight misdemeanors (Damn!–they’re throwing the book at this brother!). Investigators say he broke his wife’s nose with a head-butt and punched his wife and threw a shoe at his [uninjured] infant son the next day. Here’s three ways men of means, especially those in the public eye can avoid this scenario:
1. Don’t get married or in committed relationships or have children. If you do, don’t before 30, and date younger women – Who did Jonathan pick to wife up?–a damn flight attendant two years his senior. Jonathan, 25, is a young, rich athlete still deep within his player-stage. What did he and his wife Kayla expect?–a blissful, mature, committed union? What does a man in his position gain business-wise (marriage is a business) from her? Also, wait until your marriage is stable to have children–it takes more than a few months in the honeymoon stage to ‘storm’, ‘norm’, then ‘form’ as a real team. Most young dudes only commit based off the idea of worry-free, unprotected sex. If a man doesn’t genuinely value the union, then why would he value the symbol of it (children)?
2. Seek relationship-counseling and parenting-education – These single-mother-raised dudes often have no clue what it means to be the man of the house. Who showed Jonathan how to be a loving husband?–his mom who couldn’t keep one and had different men coming in and out of their lives? Who taught him how to be a good father?–his mom who tried to play both mommy and daddy? You need training and advice before you dive head-first into these roles, especially if you didn’t grow up witnessing successful examples. I’ll bet Jonathan’s mother and boyfriends displayed that violence was how to solve parenting and relationship issues in the home.
3. Value yourself as a man, take a break – I’m not going to tell you the usual caping advice of ‘Just walk away when a woman attacks you,’ especially when we don’t know exactly what happened. However, a man who knows he might need to stay a night at a teammate’s house or hotel rather than head-butt and throw things is a wise one. As the leader of the relationship, coordinate some time to cool-down and decide if you still have the same goals and means to get on the same page.
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